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I KNOW THAT GUY!!! CRAP WHAT IS HIS NAME?! no n…

Whitney - Mar 4, 2007

I KNOW THAT GUY!!! CRAP WHAT IS HIS NAME?! no not him….the other one….in the red shirt….I think I went to Highview with him….or maybe Southeast….crap!

Oh, wait, we’d have to… Jeff Roberts - Mar 4, 2007

Only two 10 pound objects can hold a room of adults hostage:

Plastic explosives or a crying baby.

Well, after yesterday’s Miniature global stock market meltdown, looks like my options sale won’t go forward after all.

Something about chickens, counting, and hatcheries. :)

Lesson learned: When God smacks you upside the head and says “SELL AT 70”, listen.

Pediatricians would seem to be just like veterinarians: Their patients can’t communicate with them to tell them where it hurts.

Maria’s developed a new trick–caterwauling between 6 and 8 pm. My impression of her thoughts:

Ah, that was a great feeding…mmmm….look at that twirly thing up there. I’m so hap–WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!

WHAT THE FREAK IS THAT?!!!

WHY IN THE WORLD DOES MY BOTTOM HURT!

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

MAKEITSTOPMAKITSTOPSTOPSTOPSTOPWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

(add 10 mins of that)

ROFL.

I am so freakin slap happy.

… Whitney - Feb 2, 2007

ROFL.

I am so freakin slap happy.

looks like you are too.

link

[Is it wrong…]…….that I have to mention to my husband that “B-double E-double R-U-N, beer run” is NOT an appropriate lullaby?b

:-) Lyrics!

It’s Friday, I’m a new dad, the coffee has kicked in, I solved an issue for Porsche yesterday, and it’s sunny outside. My Teleconference at 7am was cancelled today. Spring isn’t far away, and the mercury hit 50 yesterday for the first time in 6 weeks of dull winter. My Dad called, and for the first time in awhile, I didn’t vent at him for 15 solid minutes about being tired, fed-up, and depressed.

After a week of exposure, I can’t get the smell of poopy diapers out of my nostrils.

I think it’s scent memory.

Well, looks like most of my team at work has my blog address now.

:-) Oh well.

Once again, I am sorry. How many hours of free ba…

Jeff Roberts - Feb 1, 2007

Once again, I am sorry. How many hours of free babysitting do I owe you?? :-)

(Off I go to write flattering posts about each member of your team…)

Maria’s world is expanding a bit, including a preference for being awake with the lights on…

…which is a problem if she sleeps during the day, then wants to be awake last night. We had her up for her 4am feeding, and that was it. Her day started from that point, and she was UP, baby :)

She is beautiful. I am so happy for you and Whitne…

Susan - Feb 2, 2007

She is beautiful. I am so happy for you and Whitney. Enjoy the baby!!!

Beautiful! And she has your haircut, too!

she is beautiful! congrats to you two! i am so happy for you. enjoy–they grow fast.

Is it a requirement that a good labor and delivery nurse be a mother?

Man, I’m tired.

I dunno but Sandra once had an OB/GYN who became a…

Jeff Roberts - Feb 2, 2007

I dunno but Sandra once had an OB/GYN who became a lot more caring after having her own first kid :-)

Friday:

5:00 am - Alarm Clock rings
6:00 - arrive at hospital. One contraction in the parking lot
6:30 - Pitocin drip starts 5mL/hr. External fetal and uterine monitoring.
7:30 - Pitocin drip to 10mL/hr. Whitney and I take a 30 min nap.
8:30 - Pitocin drip to 15mL/hr. Mild contractions.
10 - Pitocin drip to 35mL/hr. Interesting contractions. Labor seems to be established. IV removed. Maria has significant heart-rate deceleration (a “decel”)
12 - Contractions slow down.
2pm - Contractions stopped.
4:30 - Water broken by midwife. Better contractions 3-5 mins apart.
6:30 - No change in dilation or station. Pitocin augmentation begun again, at 15mL/hr, upped every 20 minutes.
6:30 - 7:30: Transition 7cm to full dilation. Contractions at 100+, 2 mins apart. Whitney breathes through them like a champ.
7:30 - “Get Melody! I feel like pushing”
7:30 - 9pm: Pushing, in various positions.
9pm - Whitney’s exhausted, Maria transverse at -2 station. Her head is wedged 90 degress from her body. No position (Hands and knees, etc.) has helped. To this point, still no pain meds. Epidural offered, accepted, and the on call anesthesiologist paged.
9:30pm - Epidural placed. (Aside: This guy was GOOD…placed an epidural in a woman having contractions 40 seconds apart, exhausted, and barely cooperative.)
9:45pm - pushing attempted with epidural placed. No change. Signficant heart-rate decels. I decide we’re going for a C-Section. I’m scared to death I’m going to lose both my girls. Whitney’s BP is rising fast, she’s hemorrhaging, she’s exhausted, and Maria’s heartbeat is failing.
10:30 - O.R. team in place. Operation begins.
10:40 - Maria born
10:50 - I follow her with the pediatrician back to the nursery. Whitney goes to recovery.
11:30 - Whitney back in her room

Maria Elizabeth Combs (“mec”)

Born via Cesarean Section at 10:40pm February 10
8 lbs 5 oz
19 inches long
APGAR score: 9.9

Mom and baby are doing well.

I have never been more scared, elated, or tired in my life.

Pics to follow

Dude! I mean, Dad! (and Mom! and big Bro!)

Jeff Roberts - Feb 0, 2007

Dude! I mean, Dad! (and Mom! and big Bro!)

Congratulations!

Congratulations! You are the man … no, wait, Whitney is the man. Congratulations to all three (and Joey) from all of us here at the Jarvis house …

I love “Grey’s Anatomy”, but they Jumped the Shark many different ways last night.

2. A very special…: On tonight’s very special introduction to the three-episode story-arc from Hell, we concoct a ferry-boat hitting a container ship, turn thousands of characters you don’t care about into hamburger so that we can beleaguer a metaphor for a central character who feels lost. Yay.

3. Hair care…: We will have an entire, poorly shot elevator scene of uncomfortable actors trying to do material about an aging, balding black man’s hair. The only female will cluck her hen-like, “Leave him Be!” Four more times that should be allowed by the Screen Actor’s Guild.

“Man, you look on edge. You haven’t even said anything and you just look totally stressed!”

“My family tree isn’t so much a tree as a climbing, criss-crossing trestle of ivy.”

“You ever wonder if Jesus told a lot of jokes? I have this vision of him telling all these blonde jokes then going, ‘No, really…they’re these people from up North. Scandinavia. Bah, what do you people know from comedy?! Oy Vey!’”