Perhaps I came out of the womb worrying. Pehaps it’s learned behavior. Luke 12:25 says: 5 And which of you by worrying can add a single [a](C)hour to his [b]life’s span?26 If then you cannot do even a very little thing, why do you worry about other matters? What does this have to do with 2011, anyway? I worried alot this year. I worried about myself, my wife, my kids, my parents, my job, my church obligations. And, frankly, I freaked-out. Often. So often, that yesterday and today, I talked myself through “this is usually the part where I freak out,” because the triggers were all there. Self-awareness is all that I have sometimes whenever I see fear, rage, selfishness, hate, guilt, jealousy, betrayal, disappointment, anger, etc. building. I finally can see it coming and I believe I can choose something different. ...

Some things are stories. Some things are not. There are facts I remember about my idiosynracies and ticks, and those of my fellow humans that just don’t go anywhere. They’re kinda just…there. These are those: I once roomed with a guy D.E.F. D had this curious Pavlovian response to riding in a car for any length of time > 2 minutes. He’d go to sleep. My other roomie once took him on a road trip from Georgetown, Kentucky, to Jackson, TN. D slept the entire way there and the entire way back. I hate the blue ring optometrists use for glaucoma checks. Basically it goes like this: They dilate your eyes, you can’t open them for love or money, and then you need to open like a droog from Clockwork Orange so the optometrist can move this DEATH MACHINE towards your eyeball. Really, it looks like a scene out of a Bond Movie, complete with bad dialog. Only here the thing–it’s not Sean Connery’s penis they’re going to ginsu, it’s YOUR EYEBALL. Usually, this procedure takes like 2 minutes at the end of the exam. Poor Dr. Jones in Jackson, Ky used to devote 20 minutes to this and we both dreaded it. Supposedly, there’s a puff-of-air thing they can do to check for glaucoma. I believe this is a lie perpetrated by optometrists, cruelly giving false hope there will be no more BLUE RING DEATH MACHINE. Once something reaches a certain level of messiness, I mentally refuse to deal with it. I focus my attention somewhere else, like a pair of shiny keys or maybe the weather outside. This drives my wife nuts, part 1. When I’m upset, I fold things. I’ve compulsively folded an entire load of towels without realizing it. When I’m REALLY upset, I clean things. I once reorganized my DVD collection at 2am while listening to PCHH I have an extreme fear/fascination thing with knives. Once when I was 2 or 3, I got my dad’s jacknife out and cut my fingertip to ribbons. Whenever I see my kids near one, I’m sure the same thing will happen to them. Yet, I like knives very much–my father and I used to bond over them every Christmas–and my cherished birthday present this year from my wife was a Ken Onion Chive by Kershaw. Segue: I used my pocket knife in lieu of scissors when wrapping all my gifts this year. Yes, I’m unaccountably proud of this. I seemingly can’t do household chores without music or a podcast playing. This drives my wife nuts, part 2. I have a mental block about the following things: Housepainting, Barbecue Grilling, Drum Brakes, carburetors, general carpentry, automatic transmissions, audio/visual equipment, HVAC operation & repair. I’m sure I could think of others. People with explosive tempers and feelings of paranoia oughtn’t own firearms. I do not own firearms. Tempur-pedic isn’t all hype. Try one for yourself. As I get older, I find increasingly fewer things offer any escape. Video games, meh. Kids…sometimes. Joey’s gone this week, and I miss him pretty badly. My phone is like a security blanket. Seriously can’t believe how fast I got here from May ’til now. This drives my wife nuts, part 3. I basically couldn’t care less what I wear, provided it’s decent and has < 2 holes in it. #tdmwn

When I was about 5 years old, my mom decided to drop me off with my aunt at her office while she did business in town. As my aunt worked in the District 10 Department of Highways in Jackson, Kentucky, her job was utterly regular and somewhat dull unless something extraordinary happened–>lots of overtime, somebody got fired, that sort of thing. View Larger Map As it was the middle of summer, nothing like that happened. Anyway, my mom rented a VHS video of Pound Puppies and dropped me off. My Aunt took me to the big conference room in the middle of the cinder-block building and plopped me in front of the television, daring me to move. ...

I’m rolling off a 16 month stint as the sole proprietor of a Java library used internally where I work. Yep, it was an almost unheard-of situation within corporate America: I had no project manager, no marketing rep, no support staff, no unique testers. I was responsible for API design, test plan, interfacing with multiple teams, delivery, support, infrastructure. The works. In short, I loved it. I loved getting to code 6 to 12 hours a day, every work day, working through design decisions, collaborating with other teams. I’d go to bed noodling on design problems, I’d often get insight into them over coffee, then I’d have them implemented by that next night. Most of the people I worked with were colleagues of mine from way back. My only mandate was “make them happy,” and take care of my own stuff. I had a project manager for the first month or so; once he was satisfied I had my stuff together, the reigns were off. ...

Update: We didn’t really have Neural Programmi… Harold Combs - Aug 3, 2019 Update: We didn’t really have Neural Programming in 2016.

Wow, the blogger.com interface sure has changed since the last time I posted! Well, to catch-up a few things: My job title is now ‘Software Architect’. This is avowed to be one of the most despised roles in all Software, since Developers resent architects’ unrealistic, out-of-date ideas, and managers resent anyone besides them directing their teams. Yay, me. I had a motorcycle residing at my house for ~1 week in late June. This was one of the worst episodes in my life, and rocked me to my very core. In a true case of ‘be careful what you wish for’, I lied and manipulated my way to take advantage of a tragic situation (my uncle’s motorcycle accident) to come by a bike that I didn’t really want. My inner King Baby came to the fore in many ways. I hurt everybody. The bike left a week later, and relations with my parents haven’t been the same since. Joey is now a Webelos II, the last stage of Cub Scouts before becoming a Boy Scout. We attended the district camp-out at the R.J.Corman property this past weekend and had a blast. Gracie is now walking, taking 27 steps unassisted yesterday. Maria is now in pre-school at the First Methodist Church in Georgetown 3 days a week. She’s loving it, and seems to be flourishing amid the social interaction and learning environment. Whitney and I are making the first halting steps toward selling our house and buying another. This is possibly the worst time to sell a house since WWII, but hey, when you get The Call, one needs to answer it. We already absorbed several huge maintenance issues with our disaster of a house by ignoring this leading. Whitney currently has car fever, and if you read this blog you know I *always* have car fever. Current target de lust is a Toyota Prius 5. Fifty one miles per gallon sounds pretty ideal for the day-to-day operations of Whitney and the kids, plus it would make my bi-weekly trips to Louisville cost 1/2 as much versus the Camry of Doom. Whitney believes the Camry of Doom has a terminal mold problem. I can’t smell any mold, which she says is part of the problem. Andy Rooney is retiring from 60 Minutes as of this weekend. This man has been doing weekly essay commentary my entire life (1978-present). Wow. My current daily car fix comes from www.thetruthaboutcars.com The site is everything I always wanted www.autoextremist.com to be, and has one awesome refugee from VWVortex, Jack Baruth. I ramble sometimes. My current work notebook is a 13" Macbook Air, with a 128GB SSD. This thing is pure sex, and I love it. I hit an all-time adult weight low of 190 lbs a few weeks ago, at which time people started asking me if I had cancer or something. I don’t–the tests came back negative. Basically, the meds I’m on increase your metabolism, particularly of protein. In short, my body’s been eating my muscles since March. Since my last doctor’s visit, I’ve been eating Cliff Bars and mainlining protein like an Atkins Addict, and my weight, muscles, and energy level seem stable. I’m involved in an addiction accountability group that strengthens me every week, and if this were an anonymous blog, I’d love to tell you all about it. If you’re interested in details, please email me. We got a new dishwasher at home. It’s the little things that make you smile. I think Google+ is a great idea, but it’s like a bar with no women–not that interesting. I’m a twitter fiend. Love it and the immediate access to some of the best minds in the world, particularly in tech. I no longer sleepwalk or wake up exhausted. Yay, modern chemistry! I no longer feel the need to disrupt, destroy, or be defensive all the time. Ibid. I still love my Motorola Atrix 4G, and think Android fits my mind better than iOS. My wife loves iOS. God has a sense of humor, what can I say?

Definition: Dutch Disease After reading Alan Greenspan’s book last year, one concept that’s remained with me is Dutch Disease, which I (over-)simplify to mean: When you have one huge cash cow industry/revenue stream, then all your other industries suffer. Combine that with this article on tech crunch. I see a similarity there, in that tech companies that were formerly innovative latch onto a current upper-bound revenue source (Let’s say MS Office) and short-change other opportunities, or (worse yet) view them in terms of the current technology. ...

I attended the Central Ohio Software Symposium in Columbus, Ohio this past weekend. What follows are my reviews of the event overall and the individual sessions I attended. Overview Most conferences suck, frankly. They’re usually put on by a single company, and are a combination of too much marketing pitch, too little content & reality. As it’s name would suggest, a No Fluff/Just Stuff conference is none of that. No vendors. No showy crap. Just industry-leading experts presenting what they’re doing and how they’re doing it. ...

Thanks for the “Kevin Smith” link to my … Doug - Jun 4, 2011 Thanks for the “Kevin Smith” link to my Twitter. :)

Cleaning-up my life, mostly. Next week will mark 9 months on the upward swing, moving from a place of depression, passivity, and “life of quiet desperation” to a place of reality, assertiveness, and self-confidence. I’m not “there” yet. Likely, I never will be, fully–that’s the humility that comes with this process. Growing-up and gaining contentment (NOT complacency!) is a continuous process. Things that have helped me along the way, so far: ...

In a phrase: It obviates your need to think. It encourages you to simply react. I’m reading this great book by Andy Hunt called, Pragmatic Thinking and Learning. A key thesis in Chapter 5 is “Think, Don’t React”. Reaction is emotional, and involves the fear-based lower brainstem, engaging in stuff like “Fight or Flight,” Territorialism, Hissing at problems. If you’ve read my blog from years past, I’ve done plenty of hissing at a problem. ...

This is part confessional, part “working it out on paper”. I am an intuitive, synthetic problem solver. That is, more often than not, a holistic solution pops into my head. I don’t really work it out; I just wait for inspiration to strike and then try like hell to keep up with it. It oftentimes feels like someone else solved the problem when I’m done. So, what’s the big deal? I mean, the problems get solved, and my paychecks keep coming, so what of it? Well, it’s tough being a Computer Scientist with this frame of mind. ...

I’ve been part of two SCRUM rollouts so far. One was a grassroots effort, the other organizational. I have some thoughts I’d like to share, in no particular order. It’s no silver bullet. Repeat that last sentence 10, 50, 1000 times until you believe it. If your work habits, talent, training, and support roles suck, your (insert work product here) will still suck using SCRUM. On the bright side, you’ll understand that in 2 weeks to 2 months, instead of years after the product is in the field SCRUM teams: 10 people max, and that’s pushing it. Five is better. I was on a 6 person SCRUM team, and it was great. Team of Specialists versus Team of Generalists? I’ve no idea. I’ve arguments for either approach, and no one answer fits everywhere. Yay, “It depends.” I could be a consultant. The team must see the value in SCRUM. It’s a lightweight process, but it requires them to think and communicate on a level they haven’t before. If it’s a drag AND they have to communicate to one another, they’ll abandon both. Don’t B.S. the acceptance criteria. If you don’t complete a user story, you don’t get credit, period. This sort of boundary helps focus the SCRUM team when it’s committing to a story. Enable the team to organize itself once it’s gelled. Yes, that means kicking the dead weight overboard, too. Empower the SCRUM master to do his/her job. Measure if s/he does it. Project Manager != SCRUM Master. The skillset and attitude is different. For heaven’s sake, DO NOT MAKE THE TEAM LEAD THE SCRUM MASTER. I was a team lead and a scrum master for about 2 weeks. Disaster ensued, and I got help for my team. Basically, anything that lets the team lapse into a parent/child relationship will destroy a SCRUM team–they must feel like they have the power to make something happen. Some things that I don’t think SCRUM wholly solves (nor seeks to, if you seek a cop-out): ...

So, the other day, Whitney and I found ourselves at the UK Arboretum enjoying one another’s company and remarking on how little clothing 18-22 year olds wear while exercising. As part of our walk, we discussed the next step in our lives. You see, the last 5 years hasn’t been all roses for us. It’s only in the past 8 months that I’ve gotten my head screwed-on straight about my faith, my place in this world, and my attitude towards life. If you read enough of this blog, you can chart my up and downs like a sine wave, especially when I was 25->30. Sometimes, I’ve been there for my family; other times, I’ve hidden at work or in my own destructive pursuits, leaving Whitney to be a single parent to 1, then 2, now 3 children. ...

all I have to say is,“WHAT IS WITH YOU LEXING… Whitney - May 3, 2011 all I have to say is,“WHAT IS WITH YOU LEXINGTON PEOPLE AND THE RED?! Red is not an interior color that calms! It is ATROCIOUS - not attractive!” Is there such a thing as a colour lemming? ;)

I went to college with a guy, M, who was homeschooled and had nearly perfect elocution. Bizarrely perfect, in fact, since he came from Winchester, Kentucky. To be precise M didn’t have elocution, he had diction–his voice was distinctive and every word was measured. He also spoke, as Peter Egan would say, as though he was holding a pencil clenched in his back teeth. One day he was describing the next course in his Business degree. I swore he said, “Mmmmkro”. ...

I’ve been a Dave Ramsey follower for 9 years now. Granted, I’ve never made it past baby step 3 because I’m a selfish spendthrift, but I’ve kept my debt load admirably low throughout that period. We’ve pretty much saved-up for everything we bought in that time, aside from our Honda Odyssey, and I swore with that one that I’d let that sick, in-debt feeling stay with me so I’d never make that mistake again. ...

I still argue it was worth the debt. I’ve nev… Whitney - Mar 5, 2011 I still argue it was worth the debt. I’ve never slept that well. A great night’s sleep was worth it. I think it was, too. Honestly, I assumed we’d be sending it back after 30 days and buy something sane. Much like the Miele vacuum cleaner, though, GEEZE what a product. Great stuff…look forward to 20 more years with it. ...

What do cars and electronics have in common? Pornography improves the breed. More generally, both benefit from something that captures the imagination and drives obsessive behavior and improvements to the delivery medium. For electronics, this was VHS, DVDs, HDtv, internet, streaming video, etc. For cars, this was racing. Where did most of the technology we use today come from? Rear-view mirrors, synchromesh transmissions, fuel injection, electronic engine controls, high compression/high rpm operation, turbochargers, ABS, traction control, stability control, all derived from the singular, “Racing improves the breed.” ...

The best feature of a Toyota Camry XV20? External temperature gauge. Yes, the car’s practically perfect, in that annoying Mary Poppins way, but I love clicking that button on the dash and seeing the outside air temperature.