I was staring at myself in the mirror a moment ago, washing my hands, thinking of a time years past, when I sat across from a Hazel Eyed woman:
“Why do you keep doing that?” she asked.
“What?”
“You keep doing sign language when you’re talking. Why?”
It was the Fall of 1999. That summer, I thought I’d lost my soul mate, the woman who’d taught me a little bit of sign language. Her name was Whitney. I loved her so much I couldn’t see straight. Even this sparkling gal from Menifee County couldn’t cheer me up.
Now, in the Fall 2009, 10 years on, I realized God returned to me that woman I love.
Fact is, I got a second chance. Sad to say, I’ve spent most of the last 4 years in bitterness and self-delusion. When you bottle up so much darkness, it’s hard to see the light shining through. Back in 1999, I would’ve given everything for even a glimpse of the blessings I have now–a life with Whitney, children, memories, laughter. Yet, I never felt blessed.
Staring into that mirror, looking at my nearly 31-year-old self, I felt blessed. Truly blessed. I love my wife. I always have. I always will.
Strange, rambling, meodramatic (“Squirrels in my pants”) I know…just wanted to capture it.