So, several days ago, I faced that yearly task–picking out the perfect Valentine’s Day card for my wife.
I’ve approached this different ways in the past: One year, I eschewed getting her anything, proclaiming V-Day as “the invented holiday that makes no sense”. Results were predictable, in hindsight. After that, I spent several years executing my usual card-search routine:
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Enter Store.
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Walk to card aisle
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Find appropriately topical card. (That is don’t buy “Granny you’re my valentine” if you dating Daisy Fuentes.)
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Ensure card is in English
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Purchase said card as quickly as possible
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Leave
That’s the way I’ve always bought cards. If you’re a man and you can’t buy a Birthday/Christmas/Valentines/etc. card in under 4 minutes, turn-in your man-club membership card on the way out.
This year was different. I actually went shopping for the card, and I had Maria with me, so we took our time and navigated through several cards before I found one I liked.
Yeah, I’m going soft. Daughters do that to you, I guess.
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ANYWAY, the “rant” part: So, in considering more than just 2 cards this year, I noticed a disturbing trend in the majority of the “To Wife From Husband” cards. Let me paraphrase several at once:
I know I never tell you’re pretty, or that I appreciate you. I know I’m not there when you need me. I know the kids scream at you 24/7, and that you’re run ragged most of the time. I know I act like an overgrown 2-year-old…
…I’m so lucky I have you. Happy Valentine’s Day.
Now, I’m not a woman, but the above pissed me off. If it were one card, I could understand, but it seemed like the MAJORITY were like that. To find a card that actually expressed any semblance of my feelings toward my wife, I had to go outside the “To Wife” headings entirely.
Basically, fellas, if you’re married, and you feel the need to give a card like the above to the MOTHER OF YOUR CHILDREN, take a step back, drop the card, take the day off work, and be nice to her. Do something for her. Love isn’t words on a card, it’s actions, daily thoughts, sacrifice, care, and devotion.
To overextend, most of the marriages in this country fail, but I think most of that is people not taking the time to do the little things that show every day, “I chose you. I choose you. I will ALWAYS choose you.”
That is love, the greatest gift God gave us. Today, find your wife, kiss her and let her know you love her.
And yeah, get her the card, too. A decent, romatic one. :D