:) for those of you not big on melancholy, I have happier, more involving posts than this is likely to be.
For some reason, I’m lonely tonight. Truly, the Christian is never alone, washed as he is in God’s love, but in the dark watches of the night, witnessing the glorious sunset as I did today, and yet seeing the frailty of life as I also did today, it makes one yearn for his loved ones to enclose him, their love a talisman against death and solitude.
I always remember a quote about Dante’s Inferno, about limbo the level of hell that contains the virtuous pagans like Socrates, Plato, et al. Theirs was an eternity without pain, but it was also an eternity away from God, and that was the real torture. Hidden in that reflection is a truth: Humans are creatures of group, of belonging, of allegiance.
My Love is far away from me now, vacationing in Tennessee. I wasn’t expecting to hear from her tonight, but she called. It was wonderful, and it was also painful: It reminded me of the distance between us. Somehow, this distance seems so much more biting than the normal 85 miles that separates our daily lives. I miss her :-) There I said it. Shoot me.
Further, my Aunt Norie. Poor dear lost her lifelong wager with gravity on Memorial Day, falling 12 feet from a barn loft, breaking 7 ribs on her left side. She lay immoble on the stall floor for over an hour until help came. This led to bleeding inn her lungs, leading in turn to a trip from the backwater’s of medicine to St. Joseph’s in Lexington. She’s due for surgery to remove the blood in her lungs tomorrow ‘round 6 pm. For those of you so inclined, a few prayers would be most welcome. She breathes only painfully, but remains fiesty as ever.
I guess the thing that has me so down is her accident’s reminder to me of how fragmented and torn my Mother’s family is and ever will be. And over what? Money, jealousy, vendetta one for another. Good reasons, I suppose. And yet, how is it that people sprung from the same womb could turn on one another like hyenas?
I have no idea, but I pray whatever blood of theirs within me stays dormant forever.